A letter to the bank : ‘Please pay all my bills.’
Wrote to the doctor, ordered up more pills,
Dispatched greetings for birthdays and anniversary occasions,
And Hari Ryu cards, to friends of Islamic persuasions.
A cheque for alimony, to my first wife;
One to the underwriters, for insurance of life;
Another to my sister, to settled an old debt;
And one for my nephew, to buy a Meccano set.
Confirmation to a travel agent, booking a holiday in Spain,
And sent on a chain letter from a faggot queen called ‘Wayne’;
My coupons to Littlewoods, with the coming month’s pools,
Plus a bank draft to my sons, for fees at their respective schools.
Aye, God bless all those Post men,
World-wide, a race apart,
Out in all inclement weathers; of stalwart spine and heart;
And these letters would sure deliver,
Through storms of snow and hail,
If the cretin-brained ship’s agent
Hadn’t forgotten to take off our mail.
Wrote to the doctor, ordered up more pills,
Dispatched greetings for birthdays and anniversary occasions,
And Hari Ryu cards, to friends of Islamic persuasions.
A cheque for alimony, to my first wife;
One to the underwriters, for insurance of life;
Another to my sister, to settled an old debt;
And one for my nephew, to buy a Meccano set.
Confirmation to a travel agent, booking a holiday in Spain,
And sent on a chain letter from a faggot queen called ‘Wayne’;
My coupons to Littlewoods, with the coming month’s pools,
Plus a bank draft to my sons, for fees at their respective schools.
Aye, God bless all those Post men,
World-wide, a race apart,
Out in all inclement weathers; of stalwart spine and heart;
And these letters would sure deliver,
Through storms of snow and hail,
If the cretin-brained ship’s agent
Hadn’t forgotten to take off our mail.
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